It's Been A While
I'm a big fan of top ten lists. I always have been, I always will be. As a matter of fact, if I were to list my top ten forms of writing, top ten lists would be in the top ten. Therefore, I present to you the reader: my top ten list of favorite phrases and sayings I have heard in the last 5 months.
1) "Randy "Macho Man" Savage is from the maritimes." - This was said by "Awesome" Jimmy Dawson, an electrician and former pro wrestler from PEI. I refuted this statement, as I happen to know that Macho Man is from Florida, however, the discussion got heated and I relented. Henceforth, Macho Man is from the Maritimes.
2) "If you don't mind too terribly, I'm gonna kill one of you cocksuckers." - This was said by "Murder", one of the many colorful people I met while I was on vacation. This was his "catchphrase". This made me think that maybe I could benefit from a catchphrase of my own.
3) "You got a head on you like a bucket of ski-doo parts." - This was said by Sean Horvath, my roommate while in jail. This was one of his many insults, several of which will appear on this list.
4) "I'll hit you with so many combinations, you'll think you're a safe." - This was said by Sean Horvath while threatening somebody at the dinner table.
5) "It looks like somebody set your face on fire and put it out with a chain." - This was said by Sean Horvath, probably while playing cards, as this was one of his favorite activities.
6) "I'm never smoking crack again" - This was said by so many people, it would be impossible to document them all. This is one of my personal favorites because it was always said with a straight face.
7) "As soon as I get out, I'm gonna smoke a big fucking bowl." - This was said by so many people, it would be impossible to document them all. I also like this one because I appreciate the honesty and ambition.
8) "I'm never coming back to this fucking place." - This was said by pretty much everyone in jail, myself included. It was especially entertaining coming from Sean Horvath, who has spent 6 of the past 7 years behind jail on and off. This is the last of the three jail vows I encountered.
9) "On the outside, I drive a Ford Escalade" - I don't remember who said this, although it was more than one person. These same people can't even come up with enough money in jail to buy a few coffees.
10) "I'll give you so many rights, you'll think you're a treaty indian." - This was said by Sean Horvath while threatening somebody at work in the potato shack.
This list is not meant to be all-inclusive. If you've been around me when I've been drunk recently, I've probably hit you with one of these. And, even though it has nothing to do with my list, here's a picture of Sandy.
God I missed her.
1) "Randy "Macho Man" Savage is from the maritimes." - This was said by "Awesome" Jimmy Dawson, an electrician and former pro wrestler from PEI. I refuted this statement, as I happen to know that Macho Man is from Florida, however, the discussion got heated and I relented. Henceforth, Macho Man is from the Maritimes.
2) "If you don't mind too terribly, I'm gonna kill one of you cocksuckers." - This was said by "Murder", one of the many colorful people I met while I was on vacation. This was his "catchphrase". This made me think that maybe I could benefit from a catchphrase of my own.
3) "You got a head on you like a bucket of ski-doo parts." - This was said by Sean Horvath, my roommate while in jail. This was one of his many insults, several of which will appear on this list.
4) "I'll hit you with so many combinations, you'll think you're a safe." - This was said by Sean Horvath while threatening somebody at the dinner table.
5) "It looks like somebody set your face on fire and put it out with a chain." - This was said by Sean Horvath, probably while playing cards, as this was one of his favorite activities.
6) "I'm never smoking crack again" - This was said by so many people, it would be impossible to document them all. This is one of my personal favorites because it was always said with a straight face.
7) "As soon as I get out, I'm gonna smoke a big fucking bowl." - This was said by so many people, it would be impossible to document them all. I also like this one because I appreciate the honesty and ambition.
8) "I'm never coming back to this fucking place." - This was said by pretty much everyone in jail, myself included. It was especially entertaining coming from Sean Horvath, who has spent 6 of the past 7 years behind jail on and off. This is the last of the three jail vows I encountered.
9) "On the outside, I drive a Ford Escalade" - I don't remember who said this, although it was more than one person. These same people can't even come up with enough money in jail to buy a few coffees.
10) "I'll give you so many rights, you'll think you're a treaty indian." - This was said by Sean Horvath while threatening somebody at work in the potato shack.
This list is not meant to be all-inclusive. If you've been around me when I've been drunk recently, I've probably hit you with one of these. And, even though it has nothing to do with my list, here's a picture of Sandy.
God I missed her.
posted by Unknown at 9:51 p.m.
1 Comments:
Y Roc! its great to have u back in the blog of things, can't wait for the next top-ten, its very high-fidelityish of u :)
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