I got that beat

A man is drinking all afternoon and suddenly pukes all over his shirt.
He slobbers, "My wife is gonna kill me,"
The bartender says, "Put a twenty dollar bill in your shirt pocket and tell your wife that a drunk threw up on you and then gave you the twenty bucks to clean your shirt."
He agrees it's a great idea. When he gets home, he walks in, tells her the story and hands her the money.
She says, "But there's forty dollars here."
He says, "Yeah, he shit in my pants too."